dress up

Happy Halloween everyone!!! Me and the ladies are going out to West Hollywood tonight to party the night away. If you don't have any plans you should come out...it's always good times. I'll put up some pics in my next blog. So stay tuned.

who are you kidding

Note to self: When out drinking beer, just order a pitcher. Because really, who are you kidding.

Heroes

So just to give you an update, my car is working again!!! yay car! Yay Bobby!!!! Anyways, after he got it working I headed over to Chris' and we had a mini Heroes marathon. He had been at me to start watching the show so I finally watched the most recent. I was a little lost because I hadn't seen the first four episodes so I spent yesterday evening catching up. Thank you Chris, now you got me hooked on the damn show. If you havent seen the show, click on Chris' link in my "Links" section and he has a clip on his page. It is an awesome show, and now I will be watching it every Monday.
Well, the weekend is here, my sisters are visiting. I'm excited. Good times. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

vacation

I should be at work right now in my class with my kid making some cool Halloween thing or out on the yard playing a game....but i am at home. Why you ask? Becasue my car decided to go on vacation this morning.... while I was on my way to work.... in the middle of a busy street. Good times. I was coming to a red light and let up on the gas and my car went to sleep. No engine running, no power to the car, no hazards, no fun. I instinctively hit the hazards but with no power to the car it did nothing. The cars behind me were getting mad so i jumped out of the car (real smart thing to do) and started pushing my car. Thankfully I was so close to a gas station and thankfully I drive a toy car so I was able to push it. Before I had even pushed it 10 feet I heard the beeping noise the car makes when you are about to turn it on. Relieved, I jumped back in the car, quickly turned it on and drove back home. Before I made it home it turned off again and then turned back on. My car was teasing me. Anyway, so now I am sitting at home waiting for Bobby to come look at it. Hopefully he can figure out what's wrong with it and I can go to work. I want to go to work.

The Mondays

Had a case of the Mondays today....decided to sleep in and not swim. I was kind of grumpy all day. My schedule was changed around again at work. Hopefully this one will stick longer than a week. Actually I take that back. I got a new client and they live really far away. I wouldn't mind it changing again to a client that lives closer. In any case I hope it turns out to be a good week.

Where to start

There are a million things going through my mind. I want to write about work. I want to write about how I am feeling. I don't even really know where to begin. I guess I can start with work. I'm happy with work. I love it. However, it is stressful. Yesterday was pretty stressful, my emotions were tested. I would be lying if I said that I do not form emotional attachments with the kids I work with. Working so closely with these kids it is almost impossible not to build a bond with them. I know that as a professional I need to have separation between myself and my client, but sometimes it can be difficult. Yesterday I was working on a task with a child, I knew it was difficult for them. I kept pushing them to do it because I see the potential in them to achieve so much. The child got frustrated and started to cry. If a demand is placed on a child and they begin to cry I have to continue to work. The child was wailing practically in front of my face but I knew I had to keep working in order to not reinforce crying as a means of escaping work. So we kept working and the child kept crying, this continued for 20 minutes. Honestly, I wanted to cry. I wanted them to get it right, they were so close. I couldn't look at the child because it was killing me to see them cry. The crying finally stopped. They got it right. I was elated to say the least, and emotionally drained.
It was probably one of my toughest sessions so far. I think going to work already carrying around a lot of heavy emotions does not make it easier for me to deal with the emotional strain that a session like that places on you.
In other regards, life is tough. I carry anger inside me. As much as I want it to, it doesn't go away. I, unfortunately, express almost every emotion with tears. I cried yesterday and today, it's been a rough few days. Which is why I needed to write.
I need to go for a really long swim tomorrow. Besides writing, swimming is another thing that I fully control that helps relieve stress.
Well, if I am to get up to swim before I go to work tomorrow(yes i have to work this saturday) I need to go to sleep now to be rested. Good night folks.

It's play time

I did not want to get out of bed this morning. I was so comfy and warm, it was nice. My nephew however, had other plans for me. I was laying under the blankets, eyes half shut and I heard the sound of his little feet running down the hallway. As he burst in the room he fell over from the momentum, got back up and ran out of the room. It made me laugh. He came back and he layed with me for a bit and then told me it was time to get up because we were going out.

Honestly, I wanted to keep sleeping, but I had told my sister I would go with her and the kids to Santa Monica Hospitals anniversary celebration. We went and it was fun, I danced with my nephew and we got balloon animals made for us. After that. We went to Saint Anne's fall festival/carnival. He loved the rides and he tried so hard to win a little goldfish. It was cute he got frustrated that he couldnt get the ball in the bowl. That kid is so cute.
Anyways, I had a great time with him. Here are two pictures of us with our balloon animals.

Made the best of it

So yesterday Chris and I went to Knott's Scary Farm......well, perhaps I should say Chris and I went to Buena Park. We had every intent of going to Knott's but after sitting in traffic for an hour and a half I thought it would be a good idea to call my friend who works there to see if there were still any tickets. So, we are sitting at the off ramp, cars aren't moving, people are yelling...it was good times....and they were sold out..,...it sucked..but we made the best of it. We both thought, well at least we found out before we ended up sitting for another hour trying to park and all that other crap.
We didn't want to make our trip to orange county go to waste so, we headed over to downtown Disney. On the way there we stopped off at Sonic and grabbed some burgers. I LOVE that establishment. It was my first time eating there. It was so cool. I had tater tots with my burger! I was excited.
When we got to downtown disney we went to tortilla joe's for some drinks.....wow that was the best decision of the whole night. We had front row to the meltdown that happened in their kitchen. Cooks were slamming doors...dishwashers were getting angry....people were walking out on tabs....it was good times and we got to see it all unfold.
So we didnt make it to knotts, but I had a great time, just chillin and drinking. We definitely made the best of it.

early

so i've been getting up at 5am to swim laps at the community pool. Yesterday I was so proud of myself because i got to the pool right as they opened, i thought to myself "cool, I'll be one of the first people in, have a lane all to myself". yeah well a whole crap load of other people were thinking the same thing. Man, folks (myself included) are crazy. It was so packed and mind you it's 5am, dark and cold out. I had to share a lane immediately with someone. I don't mind, unless I am trying to do leg workouts (which I was), when there is someone else in the lane i have to be more careful where i am kicking.

Anyways, i know it sounds crazy, getting up at 5am to swim, but i love it. It's kind of funny, sometimes I don't fully wake up until half way through my work out. Sometimes I wonder if i'm dreaming. It's cool though, I get to see the sun rise as i'm swimming in the water. It's peaceful. Just me and the water.......

where did it go?

Holy cow this week is almost over!!! I have no idea where it went. I hope the weekend doesn't go that fast. Okay, so my birthday is coming up and I don't know what I want to do to celebrate. I was thinking Medieval times? Anyone have any ideas?

Lulu

So both my little sisters came to visit this weekend. It was nice to see both of them. My sister Irene just had a baby in July, so it is always great when she comes to visit because I also get to see my niece. She is such a cutie and I love shopping for her. I adore my nephews, but it is nice to buy little dresses and cute little outfits for her! Hehe. Well, I thought I would share some of the pictures we took.

Lulu and her cousin Matthew




Lulu and I napping





Lulu looking sleepy

passed

I passed my written exam for work!! Yay! I was stressing about it, but I found out today that i passed with an 89%! I just need to pass my field observation and then I can work with out a supervisor. I'm excited. Just thought I would let you all know.

addiction

I am addicted to energy drinks...anything with caffeine. I am too embarrassed to say how many I have a day....yes it is that bad. I am also hooked on protein bars. some days all i will have consumed is protein bars, water and energy drinks. yum. super nutritious. i am so addicted part of my getting ready for bed routine is making sure i have an energy drink available for me to drink first thing in the morning. i feel sorry for whomever decides to intervene i can guarantee that i will not be pleasant. k well i am off to sleep.

Love

Things I love: Dancing, music, rhythm, smiling, laughing, making funny faces. Good food, cheese, bread, cookies. Running, being loud, watching the sun come up over the water, Matthews laugh, Jesses elongated vowels, his inflections. Overusing commas : ) waking up and feeling the warmth of the person you love sleeping next to you. Cuddling, staring into another persons eyes, reading, sudoku, clapping, cheering, holding hands, resting my head on someone's shoulder, random joke text messages, mommy.

I feel scattered. there is no structure to this blog. I wanted to make a list so i could be thankful for loving so many things. i love so much more, it could go on forever.